Got the summons last month.Was ready to spend three days pretending to care about zoning laws. This morning I logged into the virtual courthouse. My Optimus walked into frame, placed a folder on the table, and addressed the judge in perfect…
The Robot That Just Ruined My Excuse ForeverMarch 9, 2026
I texted my boss at 8:57 a.m.:“Running five minutes late – traffic is murder.” Thirty seconds later my phone buzzed with a message from Optimus (who I left at home): “Traffic is moving at 61 km/h on your route.You are still…
The Robot That Just Became My Alarm Clock’s Worst EnemyFebruary 25, 2026
My phone alarm went off at 6:00 a.m.I hit snooze.Again at 6:09.Again at 6:18. At 6:27 the Loona robot dog trotted in, jumped on the bed, put its cold metal nose on my face and whispered in the cutest voice possible:…
The Robot That Just Replaced My Entire Cleaning Lady (and She Sent Me a Thank-You Note)February 1, 2026
Maria cleaned my house every other Friday for six years.Last week she sent me a voice note: “Hey, it’s Maria. I heard you got that new Dreame robot that does floors, windows, AND baseboards. I just wanted to say… thank you….
Post #11 – The Robot That Just Ended My Gym MembershipJanuary 12, 2026
I cancelled my $89/month gym today. Reason: the Tempo Move Pro robot that lives under my TV. What it does (and why I’m never going back): Real stats from my last 30 days: Cost: $1,295 one-time + $39/month for classesSaved: $89/month…